Friday, 3 October 2014

Basically treating this space like an outlet to vent // it is supposed to be this way anw right 

This whole inner/outer self is so excruciatingly tiring. I cannot come to terms with what I am what I feel lnside. 

I am just so sick and so tired of not being good enough. Why is it that people love her when she has got so many flaws? I try to be perfect and no one is drawn to me like moths to a flame??? It's very sad and I feel like I'm doing something wrong here - like there's something wrong w my personality or do I have a hamartia or something???? I am questioning my self worth right now and this is just going nowhere.

It seems that I have self esteem issues but I don't ok. I don't. It's just nights like this when I sit down and think too much and contemplate about a lot of things. What does she have that I don't? 

I am very upset and conflicted because I shouldn't even be thinking this way. 

My mind is whirring right now whereas the rest of my body is just screaming at me to s l e e p. It's been a long day and I'm exhausted but my head is not cooperating with me.    

Pls Chloe just shut up and go to sleep. Don't do a PAsdfghjkl. 

**side note** I wonder whether I'll rmb all the secret underlying words/codes I used on various posts. LOL WTV
 

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